Okay, it's a bit of an odd title for a blog...but i spent most of Saturday watchin' the "Love Comes Softly" movies. It gets a single woman thinkin'...i'd love to be loved like that, love to be in a relationship like that someday. *sigh*
The men i've seen around here are: not my type, too old, not attractive to me (sorry, but let's face it if one is not attractive to another ... a relationship just isn't gonna work. and i don't mean just appearance wise, yeah it works alot better if you like the way someone looks on the outside, but i also mean what's on the inside.), not interested in me, or would rather just make a joke outta me.
Anyway, i'd love to find a man who i'm attracted to both inside and out ... and he would love me for what's on the inside of me. (yeah, you've prolly guessed by now that i'm one of those single overweight women. it's true ... but not exactly by my choice. i did have a boyfriend, Jimmi, we had plans to eventually get married. but on the 1st of February of this year he calls me up - we had a long distance relationship. we'd known each other about 13 years - and says that he can't lead me down the road he was taking ... smoking and drinking. well, rah for him on that one. he also said that he didn't want to change his religious beliefs for me...he wanted to remain in the mormon belief, and attend a mormon church. well, if he knew he didn't want to change from a mormon church to mine, why didn't he say so before we got back together? MEN!!! sometimes i swear i'll never understand them. if he would've told me that he wanted to remain in the mormon church, i would've never put my heart in his hands again.
So now i'm single again, and sorta lookin' for the man that God is gonna send into my life. i'm not looking, i'm waiting for God to send just the right man into my life.
I love Love Stories, i'm a sucker for sweethearts ... the type of guy who does something (like call you just to tell you he loves you and that he's thinking of you) sweet. someone with a sense of humor, someone old fashioned ... would rather he pay for the date than have her spend one cent on the dime (okay, cept maybe on her outfit...lol). i watch a romantic movie like "sleepless in seattle" or "Love Come Softly" or romantic movies like those and i think to myself at the end of the movie, why can't that be me? why can't i be the one with the good looking, sweetheart of a man? and the conclusion i come up with is that the men in my area can't seem to look past the body shape and into the heart. i'm a sweetheart. if i have money i enjoy getting things for my friends and family, or spending it on God (a.k.a. tithing and giving to missions). i do have a cat, Patches, but i've been thinking that after she dies (which shouldn't be anytime soon) i'd like to find myself a nice small dog ... like a short hair dachsund (don't think i spelled that breed name correctly, but i think ya'll know that i meant a weiner dog). LOL! i've always pictured myself being a stay at home mom (or lately a stay at home mom who sells Avon, or Mary Kay, or maybe both). i do want kids after i'm married. maybe i'm having problems finding a man, because i'm just too picky. but oh well, i have my standards and i won't go below them for any man. i'm looking for a man between the ages of 26 - 36 (5 years younger to 5 years older than i am), he can't smoke or drink, no children, never been married before (see, i told ya' i was a picky one). he has to either already attend an Assembly of God church, or has to be willing to change to my church. (i won't change church affiliations...i'm not gonna change from AoG to a mormon or a catholic church. i just won't do it. i've seen what both religions are like...and they are no where near the attitude of the church i currently attend ~ Central Assembly of God).
Anyway, getting back to the post at hand ... LOL! why can't it be me that finds herself her prince charming? i'm every bit as female as my sister .... and she's married to a great guy, happily ... and they have an almost 2 month old baby. i don't like to admit this but with every couple oriented holiday (valentine's day, christmas, new year's, etc.) and as every year goes by, i start to think of myself as just a blob of a female. something that's just there, that nobody wants ... well, 'cept her family and friends. but as much as i enjoy the time i spend with my friends and family, i'd like to share some of my time with a significant other. a good looking guy, that's sweet on me. as christina aguilera sang on her first album, "i wanna be somebody's somebody....". *sigh* but nobody seems to want to be my special someone. so i sit here kinda broken hearted, and kinda hopeful that the next day might bring that man (the one God has intended me to spend the rest of my life with) into my life. and hopeful that we'll hit it off right away. *sigh*
Oh well, a girl can dream ... can't she? well, i think i've talked enough here today....i'll go for now, and try to be back here sooner than a month to post another entry. (hopefully the next one won't sound so "poor pitiful me", but more in a happier mood). well, 'til next post ...
Hugz & Prayerz,
LaShawn
